W.I.I.F.M (whi-phum)

Let’s break this down… the question you may need to ask yourself as you make life-changing decisions…. W.I.I.F.M (whi-phum) … “What’s In It For Me?”….

This is your life… Plum

…sweet, vibrant, full of flavor…

This is your life when your W.I.I.F.M goes wrong! prune-smoothie

DRAINED… when you make bad decisions and you don’t balance the value of your output with the value of W.I.I.F.M…

So, in deciding what to do, ask yourself W.I.I.F.M.

Is it worth it?

Now we don’t mean this is in a negatively selfish way, we mean this in a balancing way. When you make life-changing decisions that require your investment, your time, your attention, and your energy, ask yourself W.I.I.F.M? As responsible adults, we should all be giving our best efforts to any and everything we are affiliated with – careers, relationships, friendships, love, endeavors, life, etc. Part of being your best self and creating the best future for yourself includes making sound decisions for yourself.

As you evaluate opportunities, relationships, personal and professional engagements, consider how much effort you’re willing (or would be required) to invest… and ponder, what is that worth to you? Personally, we’re of the opinion that the older we get, the more mindful we should be about the time we invest and where we invest it. Your energy, your time, your efforts are priceless and cannot be given back once expended.

Careers – If you’re fortunate enough to stay within the same field, with the same employer and remain fulfilled – consider yourself blessed.

Today, the average person changes jobs ten to fifteen times (with an average of 12 job changes) during his or her career. Many workers spend five years or less in every job, so they devote more time and energy transitioning from one job to another. The Balance

With the traditional retirement age of 65, and most individuals beginning their careers around their late 20’s early 30’s… that’s roughly 40 years on average devoted to establishing a stable career and an even more stable retirement. This requires sound decision making, and consideration of W.I.I.F.M when you are targeting financial stability, professional fulfillment and a rewarding career… and a great quality of life.


Which of those can you check off?

All money isn’t good money… and money does not equal happiness (although we’d love to test the theory by winning the MegaMillions haha) but if you ask W.I.I.F.M and compare that to the level of effort, energy, time, dedication you’re willing to devote to a career move, and conclude a net gain, go for it! Win-Wins are the best!! But if the opportunity yields an unbalanced scale, you may want to reconsider.

Romantic Relationships –  Many times our romantic engagements begin as friends, but equally as important are the decisions to make that leap.  Evaluate whether ISSAWIN, and proceed accordingly.

Did you know, Census data states that as of 2015 there were 109 Million people in America over the age of 18 who were unmarried. This made up 45% of all US American citizens over the age of 18, of which the split was 53% female, 47% male. Now ask yourself when considering a beau, W.I.I.F.M. Whyyyyy should I choose them?… Similarly, put your best self forward and show them whhhhyyyy they should choose you.

After all, who has time for games?

Who has time to wait on someone to “get it together,” “do better,” or “grow up“…


with a surplus of options – albeit not all of the same caliper, but who wants to waste their energy, time, efforts, or resources for a fluke or a “representative”.1*FtkgO6LnP0vlPFzzneEqxQ.gif

W.I.I.F.M speaks to more than just a tangible benefit. It speaks to the ability of your partner of choice to build with you and you with them toward the same future-state… however, at what costs?? In asking W.I.I.F.M, consider…

  • Are you two starting from the same stages in life?
  • Will one of you have to stay stagnant while the other plays catch-up?
  • If so, does one wait for the other at the checkpoint or change courses instead?
  • Are YOUR suitcases unpacked? Or are you carrying quite a bit of baggage?
  • How much is too much to bear? Emotionally, physically, financially, spiritually, socially, mentally?



  • Do you balance each other?
  • Are your goals aligned and your intentions pure?
  • How level are the playing fields? Are you adding more than you’re receiving or are you taking more than you’re giving?
  • Is there value added for you BOTH b/c of your union?
  • Are you BOTH blossoming? Or is one growing thorns while the other is budding?


W.I.I.F.M? If you can answer that with a robust number of “+” and at the same time qualify and quantify the abundance of things you’re willing and able to provide, ISSAWIN!

However….. if the opposite holds true, might be time to find a new boo… (or maybe just be solo for a while, take a break, try other options, or even try again later). To Love or To Leave (<CLICK HERE TO READ>)

Friendships –  When It’s More Than A Vibe (<CLICK HERE TO READ>)

Now here’s a tricky one… W.I.I.F.M is not to be confused with a strategy to manipulate or “get over” on someone. It should be regarded as a way to evaluate HEALTHY, mutually beneficial relationships. No one wants to be at a loss. Everyone wants to have uplifting, contributing individuals around them. But the same rules apply.

Befriend or Be Foe (<CLICK HERE TO READ>) – one of our best articles on evaluating the motivations of others, and those of yourself…. evaluating the why’s and the what’s that draw people to each other… and deciding what’s best for you.

Apply this to various aspects of your life. Whenever considering investing your energy. You health, choices to eat better, exercise, live better, improve things around you. Your mental, spiritual or physical well-being.

Put out what you want to receive – and be honest with yourself. Do no harm to others, including yourself! You don’t know the future, but you can make decisions today that can positively affect what that future holds.

Remember… this is your life… healthy… keep it that way!



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~Shed Light, Speak Life, Spread Love~

~D’Lorah Denise~


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